My doctor told me I was eating too much meat So I decided to quit cold turkey The old turkey hunter There was an old turkey hunter, every year he went on a long hunting trip out of town, and every year the old man brought his wife back a gift. As the old man…
Every year I end up have so much Thanksgiving leftovers.. Not this year though. I’m quitting cold turkey Why does Russia not celebrate Thanksgiving? Because they hate Turkey What do you call a turkey with no arms? a turkey Obama calls Putin Obama: Hey! What are you going to have for Thanksgiving dinner? Putin: Turkey…
Someone told me turkey helps you sleep. so I bought one, but now it won’t shut the fuck up. I’ve got a terrible addiction, I can’t stop eating deli meats. I’m trying to quit cold turkey. An elderly couple go to the doctor… …and the doctor says now that you two are getting older your…
What’s the point of having wings if you can’t fly? Michael Smith wrote down *what’s the point of having wings if you can’t fly* and it sparked a philosophical ruckus. Everyone was so amazed by this line because it perfectly described how people rarely reach their full potential. When Michael was asked what inspired him…
A lady goes to a tattoo parlor A lady goes to a tattoo parlor and gets a tattoo of a turkey on her left thigh. A week later she gets a tattoo of Santa Claus on her right thigh. The artist asked what’s the significance. she replies turkey is for Thanksgiving, Santa is for Christmas….
I was Hungary… so Iran to Turkey Little Timmy So Little Timmy wakes up on thanksgiving to his parents arguing. His dad calls his mom a bitch and his mom calls his dad a bastard. Timmy asks what that means, and they say a bitch is a girl and a bastard is a boy. Later,…
